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  • Take a stiff brush and clean all the solid debris from your sheets. Pop them in the washing machine with some baking soda and detergent. You may want to presoak any stains depending on the color of your vomit. Air dry your sheets, iron well. You may want to use a linen spray for extra freshness. Remember ladies love clean sheets and clean peens. -Mr. Clean

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:09pm
  • sounds like a texan, probably a transplant. So 7:08, if Texas is so great why and the fuck don't you Texans do everyone a HUGE favor and stay there. We don't want you!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:23pm
  • And you've been sleeping on this bed since Halloween? That's fuckin' disgusting.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:09pm
  • Fuck Denver. Texans are the best!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:08pm
  • I hope you are kidding.. That is just down right funk nasty!! Can't help but wonder if that means that you don't shower often?!?! GROSS..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 9:08pm
  • that makes me want to vomit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:03pm
  • 'white guy', get a life

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:19pm
  • seriously! That's bad hygiene!

    Submitted by aligrae on Feb 24, 11 at 11:38pm
  • nothing like a sad face to sum up this text.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 12:34am
  • I'm sure there is some disgusting girl out there who will fuck your disgusting self on your disgusting sheets.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 10:12pm
  • You're fucking lazy. You're telling us that you haven't had 2 hours in the past 3 weeks to do anu laundry?!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 10:52pm
  • Everyone stop acting like the world is some kind of idiotic game of win and fail, and that who gets laid the most gets the prize.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:24pm
  • Geeeee.... The biggest obstacle between you and getting laid is CHANGING THE SHEETS??? WTF. Sounds like someone with motivation issues not someone can get laid at will

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 9:08pm
  • Omg that is so fuckin nasty. I'm ashamed to share this area code

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 09 at 7:18am
  • I think the more important question is... Why?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:46pm
  • ewww, you make 303 look horrible.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:16pm
  • Sex drugs and alchohol aren't what life is about. -Sarre

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:23pm
  • And 631 - we're not obsessed with your celebrities. The media is. That doesn't mean that anyone with an IQ of over 90 cares. And actually French music is pretty good - the hip hop is far better than American for example. And I'd listen o pretty much any kind of European folk music before listening to that detestable stuff you call country.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 9:32am
  • 631 – Trust me, everyone hates you. Just because the idiots of the world watch your movies, that doesn’t mean they’re good, they’re just showier and bigger budget. Europe has all the leading fashion houses, as well as most of the more critically acclaimed cinema. Europe, especially England, has made far more popular music than America. How would you know anyway? 95% of you never leave your country.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 9:30am
  • LAZY DIRTY BASTARD YOU SHOULD NEVER BE LAID AND EVERYONE IS NOT THAT VILE AND DISGUSTING SO DON'T JUDGE ALL BY ONE'S ACTIONS

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 4:07pm
  • Then grab some change and head down to the laundry mat, that or use the nearest washing machine.

    Submitted by Xi_Kagega123 on Dec 20, 10 at 3:44pm
  • 5:26, I won't deny that Americans are generally disgusting creatures, but if the rest of the world hates us, why do most other countries obsess over our celebrities. People all over the world listen to our music, wear our clothes, and watch movies with our actors. But who listens to French rock besides the French? Not many.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 6:31am
  • Peens! I love it! FCW FTW!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:11pm
  • So there I was in the shower, eating a chocolate chip cookie and holding my rifle, when I thought I heard a noise!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:04pm
  • Dude, that is fucking wrong. Don't wash them. Get brand new ones!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 7:10am
  • That shit is gross.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:42pm
  • What the faaaack. If you don't wash your shit good luck getting laid haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:02pm
  • At this point get rid of the sheets. Buy new. Also, your parents should be jailed for raising a desperate loser... You won't fuck in the sheets, but you'll gladly sleep in the crusty, smelly remnants of Halloween. Moron.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:24pm
  • People like you don't deserve to live..... Just saying....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 7:13am
  • Fake. No one could possibly live with the smell for that many days. He or she (yeah, who knows if it isn't a girl) must at least have washed the sheets a little.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 1:11pm
  • 7:04 you just made my day. :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 7:50am
  • omg that's so nasty wow

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 10:49pm
  • this OP is the dirtiest fucker EVER!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:24pm
  • Who the fark are you people?? So rotten

    Submitted by missfidycool on Feb 29, 12 at 10:07pm
  • You are a fucking disgusting individual

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:30pm
  • U don't deserve to get laid!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:04pm
  • So, this one time, I submitted a fake text, like the OP, but it didn't make it. I didn't really care, though. -White Guy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:51pm
  • The person with the sheets issue is actually a girl lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 10:56pm
  • let it ride ....she wont notice

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 11:19pm
  • 6:31 is right. You idiots are just mad because European countries don't call the shots. America has gotten stronger than any other country, except maybe China, and that just eats at you, cause it used to be France and Germany and England.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 09 at 6:45am
  • way to represent denver

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:07pm
  • ))<>(( back and forth forever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:45pm
  • yes, stupid americans, can't hold their beer! In Germany we know how to drink, not like american pussies who vomit everywhere after some drinks!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 11:17am
  • I gottan o of the skunk

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 7:05pm
  • I'm from America, and I love other countries and the people that inhabit them. I don't like being hated because I was born here, should I have somehow have chosen to born somewhere else? Doesn't really work that way unfortunately. I love movies and music from everywhere. We aren't all the same, that's just media bs.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 10:26pm
  • really really gross. Vomit sheets should be washed IMMEDIATELY

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 12:40am
  • Eeeeewwww

    Submitted by mybizzy on Apr 5, 10 at 2:47am
  • Shut the fuck up mr. Germany, America rules. And ya not gonna lie this is pretty disgusting

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 13, 10 at 11:04pm
  • I think 800pm is right dude yacked, then washed the sheets. Only does it when it's that serious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 7:23am
  • Americans. Too lazy not to lie in their own filth. No wonder the rest of the world hates you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 5:26am
  • you sure are a prize

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 5:20am
  • Disgusting. End of story.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 9:42pm
  • You're fucking sick. I'm glad u can't get laid

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 9:24pm
  • There are plenty of late night laundry mats in Denver/ Boulder. I'm sure that if you really wanted some sex, you would go get that handled first

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 19, 09 at 8:29pm
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