i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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