Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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