and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
