Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
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