My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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