Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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