after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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