i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize