god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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