you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Operation Purity has been aborted
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
