How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
