I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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