I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
