Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she pinky promised me she was 18
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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