I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
