Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
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my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
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Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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