Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
