I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
