Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Randomize