bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
