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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Randomize
