4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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