It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize