I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Randomize
