just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
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