We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize