doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
