thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
