Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
