Apparently you make a good broom.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
