My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?