how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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