You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
