you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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