Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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