That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Welp...herpes.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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