OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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