i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
