He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
