What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I have already put on my inside pants.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
