I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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