What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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