I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
you never un-have a 4some
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
