I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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