did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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