did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
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This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
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Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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