i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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