i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
