Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
