Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
